Friday, 12 April 2019

She's just having a laugh

Having utterly failed to do the homework which she was set last time she went begging to Brussels for a short extension to the deadline, the Prime Minister returned this week to face the music.  She made the absurd claim that the failure wasn’t her fault because she’d outsourced the work to an essay-writing factory which had let her down by failing to deliver the work on time.  Despite being firmly of the opinion, which she had expressed forcefully on many occasions, that the essay-writing factory was run by an utterly untrustworthy cove who should never be allowed anywhere near any reputable institution of government, she still swore that she had total faith that he would deliver the required essay within a few days.
The headteacher and assembled staff listened carefully to what she had to say but found the excuses far from convincing.  They didn’t really believe that the outsourced essay was ever going to be delivered, and even if it was it was probably going to be on a different topic anyway.  But they were feeling in kindly mode; it was clear that the pupil had a range of additional needs, and rather than mark her as a failure they decided that it would be better to make ‘reasonable adjustments’ – in this case to ignore the admission of attempted plagiarism and allow a lengthy second extension to the submission date.
Whether she heard the rider about getting on with the work and not wasting the time again is doubtful, because she dashed straight back to her own classroom and announced that she and parliament could celebrate by taking a holiday for the next two weeks.  With any luck, the headteacher and staff wouldn’t even notice their absence, let alone think that she might just be extracting the Michael…

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