New complex systems of maths

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There are different approaches to the subject of mathematics, and it is possible to posit a number of wholly consistent alternative systems which produce some results which everyday life might consider to be more than a little strange. Back in my sixth form days, I was somewhat taken by the hyperbolic form of non-Euclidean geometry, in which the sum of the angles in a triangle varies according to the size of the triangle – with the extremes ranging from zero for an infinitely large triangle to 180 degrees for an infinitely small one. It’s of limited practical use in daily life (where we are, in cosmological terms, close to being infinitely small), but none the less fascinating for that.

It’s not uncommon for me to be more than a little harsh on the extent to which Sunak and his not-so-merry men are mathematically challenged, as a result of watching them struggle with some very basic arithmetic. Perhaps I’m being unfair; perhaps they’ve just developed a hitherto unknown version of mathematics, in which things which make little sense to most of us are actually part of an internally consistent system of logic which the rest of us are just too stupid to comprehend. This was reinforced today by the sight of some Tory spokesmen apparently trying to tell the world that yesterday’s round of elections was, in fact, a huge success for the party. The fringe elements have gone further: the falling number of votes ‘proves’ that the public at large has an appetite for even more extreme policies. It’s a strange equation they’ve developed in which people who refuse to vote for increasingly extreme policies can somehow be brought back into the fold by adopting even more extreme policies. Absolute success is thus equivalent to an absolute lack of votes; only when no-one at all votes for them will they feel fully vindicated. They might even have once possessed a mathematical proof of their theorem, which they’ve emulated Fermat by losing after scribbling something in the margin.

It's an interesting conjecture although, like non-Euclidean geometry, it’s of rather limited practical use to anyone else. On the other hand, my old favourite, Occam, might suggest that the simpler solution might be a more appropriate conclusion to draw. They really are just not very good at maths.